Not too long ago, I was going through a difficult time. It was one of those times when everything seemed to go wrong. I was stressed at work, Tami and I were struggling to make ends meet, and I couldn’t escape a deep cloud of discouragement. I began to pray that God would change my circumstance. He and I wrestled for hours over my repeated complaints and desires for a different outcome. Yet, as I prayed, I kept feeling led to the same passage. It’s found in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. There Paul tells us…
…a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Scholars have much debated the identity of this “thorn.” Some argue its a physical ailment, others another false teacher, others a difficult circumstance. Though we cannot say for certainty what this thorn was, Paul response here began to radically change the way I pray. Specifically it changed how I pray in a couple of ways.
First, it reminded me to pray for the transformation of my heart over the transformation of circumstance. When I have attended prayer meetings one of the things that has always struck me is that they often center on changing physical circumstances. We pray that this person would be healed of an ailment, that another would be protected, that the purchase of a home would go through. In fact, if I get really honest, so many of my prayers are really about protecting my comfort. Paul tells us that this thorn was to keep him from being conceited. It was given to throw him in a radical dependance on Jesus. It got me asking, “Am I praying as much for a radical dependency on Jesus as I am for this circumstance?”
Now rather than praying, “Lord, fix my stress at work.” I began to pray, “Let me glorify you in work.” Instead of praying, “Meet my needs!” I began to pray, “Give me eyes to see where you’ve already provided.” In His sovereignty, God does allow difficult circumstances to come into our lives. Rather than praying for their removal, do we pray that they will lead us to radically trust him more.
Secondly, it reminded me to trust God’s goodness over my answer. I can only imagine Paul’s response when Jesus said, “I’m not taking away the thorn, but my grace is sufficient for you.” No doubt, He must have been disappointed, but what a promise! When we are going through difficult times we can feel like we are at the end of the rope. If one more thing goes wrong, life is going to fall apart!! Jesus is telling Paul (and us) “I’m enough- my grace is sufficient for you and I am going to see you through.”
“Well”, we might ask, “What about the pain? How do I find hope when this hurts so much?” Jesus tells us, “My strength is perfected in your weakness.” I can’t begin to tell you how true I have found this in my own life. Often times the greatest spiritual growth of my life has come in my moments of deepest pain. Its there in the midst of the pain that I discover a God who is so good and so faithful that He doesn’t waste even a millisecond of our pain. He’s using it and He’s using it to shape and form you as a person after God’s own heart.
All of this leads Paul to say, “I boast in my weakness.” I praise God when I am out of control and don’t know what to do next. Its there in my deepest pain that God is most glorified! So bring it on!!! What can difficult circumstances, insults, and persecution do to me? Christ is on my side! It’s there when we see how weak we really are that we find ourselves in the arms of a God who is infinitely good and incredibly strong.
Can you imagine what would happen if we began to pray this way? If we began to pray not only “heal me” but “help me to know and trust you more!?” If we were as passionate about praying for new stones in this living temple as we are that things would go smoothly in building a new home!? These are prayers that I know God would answer and we would be radically changed.
Today, where is God inviting you to experience the joy of unanswered prayer? In your dependance on Him, may you find you even in the middle of the darkest circumstances of life.